Never Forget
by milomonkeyface
Summary: What if something horrible happened to Rory after These Hazy Crazy Days of Summer? Would it bring Rory and Jess together? Literati, becuz anthing with Dean is horrible!
1. Wrong

(Rory's POV)

I don't remember what we were talking about exactly, probably books, what we usually talk about. All I remember was that I was happy. We hadn't been talking to each other lately. My fault, I guess. I was the one who was so bent on being angry. But today, we just fell into our long forgotten routine. Talking, laughing, arguing playfully, me blushing, _HIM _smirking, everything seemed okay, but nothing is ever what it seems…

He'd said something funny, and I laughed out loud, that's when my phone rang, that's when everything fell apart. I remember Luke looking at me because he didn't allow cell phones inside the diner, "they distract the customers," he would say. I gave him my puppy dog face; no diner man can resist a Gilmore Girl puppy dog face. He nodded, and said only this once. I giggled at how funny he could be at the most odd moments. Sometimes I wish I never answered the phone. I wish Luke would've told me no, because I wouldn't have gone outside to answer it. I know this because I was tired, coffee deprived, and I was practically melting just looking at him. _HIM. _I hate that he was there. That he saw the look on my face go from an extremely deep shade of pink to ghost white in mere seconds. He always knew how to make me blush, and over the most simple of things. When I answered the phone, I was laughing, as usual. It was like a Gilmore Girl to always be laughing. It was like oxygen for us. My laughter died quickly though, when I heard what the receptionist on the phone was telling me. I saw _HIS _smirk fade as he saw my face get pale. I saw something in his eyes that I'd never seen before, concern? Worry? Perhaps…Love? I couldn't tell, the moment was gone. The next thing I knew I felt hot tears streaming down my face, my vision blurred. Everything seemed to be in slow motion then. I know that it's probably cliché to say that, but in this rare case, it actually happened. I saw Luke's mouth moving, he was saying, well more like yelling something. Though I couldn't make out the words, because for some strange reason I was momentarily deaf, I could read his lips. He was yelling "Everyone out!" Obviously talking to the customers. I dropped the phone as Luke and Jess stood staring at me wondering what the hell was going on. Luke was the first to break out of his trance.

"Rory? Rory, what's wrong?"

I mumbled something _I _couldn't even understand, and then everything went black.


	2. Wrong Part II

(Jess's POV)

Things were finally okay. We had been estranged for about 2 months, well 62 days to be exact, not that I was counting. When she walked in the diner, like she did all the time, I just assumed it would be like every other day. She would find somewhere to sit, not at all noticing my eyes following her every move. She would sit; I would HAVE to take her order, because I was the only person working the tables. When I asked what she wanted in a cold tone she would reply with a tone much the same as mine, if not more icy. I would give her coffee, roll my eyes, walk behind the counter, pull out a book and pretend to read while secretly watching her. I was always watching her. She was addictive. But today, she managed to completely shock me once again. When she walked in, her hair blowing wildly about her face from the wind outside, her blue eyes shining through the mess of brown hair, she looked up, and to my surprise, she smiled at me. I almost thought I was dreaming for a second, I was always dreaming about her. She walked up to the counter, giving me her best puppy dog face, begging for coffee. She was absolutely gorgeous when she did that. I smirked at how I gave up without as much as a fight. No diner man can resist a Gilmore Girl's puppy dog face, it's damn near impossible. When I handed her the coffee, she smiled warmly and said thank you. We instantly fell back into our old banter. It was like that past two months hadn't happened. I asked her what she was reading at the moment, she smiled at the mention of books. I smirked, almost smiled. I had never met a girl get so excited about books before. It made me happy, as much as I hate to admit it.

She mumbled something under her breath.

"What?" I said.

She looked up at me shyly. "I said, I'm reading 'The Sun Also Rises'."

My eyes widened in shock. Did she just openly admit to willingly reading an Earnest Hemmingway book?

"I thought you said Hemmingway puts you to sleep." I said with a smirk.

When she looked up, I saw something flash in her eyes, though I couldn't tell because before I could figure it out, it was gone.

"Well, I _did_ promise you that I would give it another try, and I'm not one to go back on my word."

I couldn't believe she actually ended up reading a book she hates just because she made me a promise. I wasn't used to people keeping their word around me.

"So, how is it so far?" I asked, genuinely curious.

A look of disdain passed over her features as she said, "Absolutely horrible! You know… maybe you could help me with it. You know, so I'll stop falling asleep?"

I almost fell over. Was she really asking me to hang out again?

"Yeah, sure." I stated coolly.

I turned around to get her more coffee, because I noticed that her cup was now empty. When I turned back around I saw her eyes dart up, as she blushed a deep shade of pink. She was checking me out. I caught her, and now she was trying to look anywhere but at me.

"Like what you see?" I asked with a smirk. This of course, caused her to blush even a deeper shade of red. I smirked, I always made this girl blush. I found it adorable.

"Umm… no. It's not like that. You see, I noticed that you always keep whatever you're reading in your back pocket, and I was just looking to see what you're reading. That's all."

I laughed, she was babbling, she always did that when she was nervous or uncomfortable. "You know, you could've just asked me."

She began to giggle. She was absolutely beautiful. I mentally cursed myself for letting this small town girl get to me the way she was. She was turning me into one of those guys that open doors, and are polite to adults. It was slowly driving me crazy, but I couldn't turn away from her.

Her phone began to quietly ring. It was like he had Superman hearing, because as soon as the phone began to jingle, Luke came out of that back, gave her a stern look, and pointed to the sign that said "No Cell Phones." She used the puppy dog face and of course he gave in. When she answered the phone she was still giggling. Of course, I could only hear her side of the conversation.

"Hello…Yes, this is Lorelei Gilmore…no she's my mother, we have the same name…can you please just tell me what this is about?

In those few seconds I saw her face go from happy to broken. She turned pale and I was suddenly worried. What could possibly have happened? I hate that I can't hear what the other person is saying.

"No… you're wrong!"

She was crying now. Not sobbing and blubbering, but there were streams of tears running down her face as she spoke. Luke began to yell at everyone to get the hell out of the diner, and that they were closed for the rest of the day.

I came around the counter to stand in front of her, and Luke stood beside me. She dropped the phone to the ground, and in landed with a resounding thud. Luke asked what we were both thinking.

"Rory? Rory, what's wrong?" He asked, obviously extremely concerned. He loved Rory like a daughter.

She began to wobble, and as she fell she mumbled something incoherently. I reached out and caught her before she hit the ground. As she lay there in my arms, while Luke went to get some cold water to get her up, I replayed the words she spoke over and over in my head, hoping to God that they didn't mean what I thought.

"She's gone."


	3. Gone

(Rory's POV)

When I woke up, I didn't know where I was. Once my eyes were fully opened I saw Luke and Jess standing over me, expectantly. As I tried to sit up Jess pushed me back down.

"Rory? What happened?" He spoke softly. Something I'd never heard him do before.

Suddenly the phone call came back to me. Everything that happened, all replaying in my mind. Suddenly tears were rolling down my face again. I got up this time, even as Jess tried to stop me; I pushed his hands away and got up. I was in the apartment above the diner, I noticed. They must have carried me up. I began to head toward the door, still silently crying when I felt Jess's hand on my arm. He slowly turned me around. I looked anywhere but at him. I didn't want him to see me like this, broken. He put his hand under my chin, and made me look at him.

"Rory, just tell me what happened. Maybe I can help, we can fix it."

I suddenly exploded. I don't know where it came from, but suddenly my tears were falling harder from my eyes as I started yelling.

"No!" I screamed. "You can't fix it! No one can fix it! She's gone, okay. That's what happened! She's gone!" I was now hitting him. My tiny fists banging against his chest, as I cried. He caught my hands, and pulled me to him. Next thing I knew, we were on the floor of the apartment, him holding me while I cried.

I knew Luke must be uncomfortable. He hates it when people cry. As I calmed down I noticed that Jess was still holding me. And I wasn't making any move to retreat from his hold on me. As I looked up from Jess's chest I saw look sitting at the kitchen table with a blank look on his face. He was unreadable. I realized that I had to go to the hospital. I had to arrange a funeral, I had to do everything. I'd also have to call grandma and grandpa; I knew mom never put them on the emergency contact list, just me and Luke. I didn't know what I was going to do. I couldn't do this by myself. I had to get started. I had to plan everything. I had to call The Grandparents. I tried to get up, but Jess's grip on me got tighter, he wouldn't let me go.

"I'm okay." I whispered. "I have to call my grandparents, and go to the hospital. I need to know what happened."

Luke must have heard me talking because he suddenly looked down at us.

"Okay, we'll go with you. Just in case." Jess whispered back.

We told Luke what we were going to do, and he said that he's going with us. The car was silent on the ride to the hospital. Luke was driving, of course, while Jess and I were smashed together, because the three of us couldn't exactly fit in the front seat of Luke's truck. Jess's hand was slowly stroking my hand, mostly for comfort, but it was driving me crazy. I'd always know that I had kind of a crush on him ever since Sookie's wedding, obviously. But with us being this close, and his hand touching any part of me was driving me crazy. I felt guilty then. My mother was dead, and here I am thinking about a boy. So I sat quietly as he continued his ministrations. When we got to the hospital, my feet froze outside the front doors. I couldn't move. I suddenly wanted to leave, and go back home. I wanted to crawl into my bed and never come out. But unfortunately, Jess wouldn't allow it. He walked over to me and put his hand on the small of my back, a kind gesture but another one that drove me mad. He slowly guided me towards the door, and inside the hospital.


	4. Falling Apart

We all walked quietly into the hospital, trying to forget why it was that we were there in the first place. We walked up to the receptionist's desk, with Jess practically pushing me. Luke and Jess looked over at me expectantly, but when they realized that I wasn't going to speak anytime soon, they asked the receptionist where we could talk to someone about Lorelei Gilmore. The woman paged someone named Doctor Matthews, and asked us to please sit in the waiting area.

As we sat, I could feel myself go numb. I couldn't feel anything. I didn't want to. A young man walked up to us with a sad look on his face.

"Hello, I'm Dr. Matthews," he said, "I'm extremely sorry for your loss." He was looking at me obviously knowing that I was her daughter. I didn't want his pity. All I wanted was my mom.

"Can you tell us what happened?" asked Luke.

"Well, apparently Ms. Gilmore was hit by a semi. And since she was in an off-road vehicle, the car rolled with so much force that she was killed instantly."

Rory let out at sob at the doctor's last comment. He actually said her mom was dead. She suddenly wanted to leave, now more than ever. She no longer cared about her responsibility to call her grandparents, and to tell everyone in Stars Hollow about this horrible loss. She just wanted to run and never look back. Jess must have sensed her urgency because he looked over at her with concerned eyes.

Rory, looked Jess in the eye and said, "I have to go."

"Rory," he stated quietly, "don't run, it won't help, okay?"

"Fine, but can we just leave, I can't stand to be here right now, please?" Rory pleaded.

"Yeah, okay," Luke said, "We'll go. Why don't you and Jess go wait in the car while I try to sort things out with the hospital? It'll only take a couple on minutes, and I'm sure you could both use some fresh air."

"Yeah, okay Uncle Luke." Jess said quietly.

Jess once again put his hand on my back, and slowly guided me towards the exit. As well exited the hospital I let out a breathe I didn't know I had been holding. We slowly walked back to the truck and climbed in. The cab of the truck was silent. Eerily silent. I wanted to say something, anything, to try and make this situation less awkward then it was. I mean, we haven't been speaking to each other for 2 months and yet he's here comforting me, and not my own boyfriend. The sudden thought of my significant other made me think of the blonde bimbo that Jess had been hooking up with over the past 2 months and all of the anger that I felt suddenly came rushing back. I knew it was wrong for me to try and start something, especially given the current situation, but I was numb, void of all emotion, and since anger was the only thing I could feel, I went with it.

"You don't have to stay here." I said quietly.

"What?" he asked, extremely confused. "I'm here and I'm not leaving."

"Well, I don't want you to have to stay here, like I'm a burden, you should go. Do something with your little playmate." I stated bitterly.

Jess's face was no longer confused, but a mixture of shock and anger graced his features now.

"I can't believe you're bringing this up now, of all moments." He stated incredulously, sliding away from me and into the drivers seat. "I'm here trying to help, which is very NOT me, and all you can do is insult me and some girl you don't even know. Wow, that's a new low, even for you."

"Me?" I questioned, challengingly. "You're calling me low? What about you! Hooking up with some bimbo that doesn't even know what two plus two is just to make me jealous, and then when I try to explain what happened at Sookie's wedding you start yelling at me. If anyone's low here, IT"S YOU!" I yelled.

Fine! Explain then, what the hell has been going on with you! Why did you kiss me, then run away to Washington for two months, and then come back all put out because I didn't wait for you like Dean would have!"

"Oh don't you dare bring him into this!" I screamed.

"Why the hell not! You brought Shane into this! So answer my questions, I'm letting you explain. Why did you just leave. Did you write me?

"No."

"Telegram?"

"No."

"Maybe a nice fruit basket?"

Stop it! No I didn't write and I didn't call, okay! But do you think I didn't try? I tried to write you a letter, but the farthest I got was 'Dear Jess.' I didn't know what to say. I had a boyfriend, and the perfect relationship, and then you come to town and make me question all of it. I mean, I showed up at that wedding with _Dean, _and the I kiss you, I was confused. And then when I came back and decided that I was going to talk to you and try to figure all of this out, I saw you with that inflatable Barbie smashed up against a tree, with your faces plastered together! So forgive me, that I didn't exactly feel like getting rejected because you found someone who would put out!" I took a deep breath and tried to regain some of my composure.

Jess looked completely shocked by my confession. Suddenly his lips were crashing onto mine, while our hands groped at hair, backs, each others hands. The next thing I knew, we were somewhat horizontal in the cab of the truck with Jess on top of me.

My thoughts were spinning at 100 miles per hour in my head. When suddenly a thought stopped on Dean and the fact that my mother just died.

"Wait," I said, "We can't do this…"

Jess slowly got off of me. I threw open the door and stood outside the truck with my back to him, I knew he was looking at me, but I couldn't face him right now, or anyone for that matter. My world was falling apart.


	5. I Need You

Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing about Gilmore Girls, so you can't sue this chick. And if you try all I own are my books and CD's and there's no way in hell your getting those, so don't even waist your time.

Rory's POV:

The car ride home was silent. After what happened in the truck with Jess Luke had come out and said we were gonna go back to Stars Hollow. Jess was no longer holding my hand, but then again I didn't want him to. I felt like a monster. My mother, my best friend, the only real constant in my life just died, and here I was arguing with a boy that wasn't even MY boy, about some girl I barely even know. I can feel _HIM _look over at me ever once in a while, but I manage to avoid his gaze all the way back to Luke's.

When Luke stopped the truck, I hurried to get out. As I do Dean walks up to the truck with an infuriated look on his face. Luke and Jess walked into the diner, I told Luke I was going to stand outside to get some fresh air for a second. I was looking at my shoes when I heard Dean yell my name, I looked up, not really wanting to see him.

"Rory! Where have you been? We were supposed to do something tonight, remember?" he paused, obviously waiting for a response, I didn't give him one. "No, of course you didn't. Instead I find you with _Jess_. You spent the whole day with him didn't you? I told you that I don't like him. I don't trust him Rory, he's only using you to make me mad. I don't want you to hang around him anymore, got it!" Dean was screaming now. I can't believe he's yelling at me, now of all times. My eyes began to well up with tears, I looked over to the diner window where I saw Jess looking at us from behind the counter with clenched fists. I pleaded with my eyes for him to help me. I almost let out a sigh of relief when he started towards the door.

"Hey, uh, Rory? Luke wants to talk to you real quick, sorry to interrupt." Jess was still talking softly to me. I figured he would stop once we were in mixed company, but I guess he was genuinely being sweet.

"No. Me and Rory are talking, and we're not finished, so why don't you just run along back inside diner boy." Dean seethed through clenched teeth. "She's MY girlfriend, okay. She's not going anywhere with you!" Dean said, emphasizing that I was his and not Jess'.

"Look bag-boy, I wasn't talking to you, okay! I was talking to Rory, and the last time I checked she can answer for herself." Jess looked really mad like he was gonna haul off and punch Dean at any second.

"Rory, come on! We're leaving so we can finish our discussion." Dean said while he reached over, grabbed my arm and started pulling me away from the diner, and away from Jess.

"Dean stop! Please…" I said as I started crying, "I can't…please…"

I fell to the ground crying. Dean stood in shock, staring at me. Jess started toward Dean, ready to pummel him for making me cry, but realized that it would probably only make things worse. So instead he stopped, crouched down and took me in his arms, holding me as I broke.

"Jess…please. I'm so scared, I don't know what I'm gonna do…" I said between sobs.

"Shhh, it's okay. Everything will be okay. I'm hear, Ror, I'm not going anywhere." Jess said as he rubbed soothing circles on the small of my back, as an effort to calm me down.

Dean suddenly infuriated at the sign of affection we were giving each other, ripped Jess from my arms and punched him in the face.

"You stay the hell away from her, Jess!" Dean yelled as he stared down at Jess.

I saw the anger burning in Jess' eyes as he rose to his feet. He started towards Dean, ready for a fight, when I jumped between them. I don't know what came over me, or how my hand had reached up without my consent, but there was a loud "smack" as my hand collided with Dean's cheek.

"Stop it Dean! He didn't do anything! My mother just died Dean, but you wouldn't know that because you're too concerned with the fact that I was with Jess to ask!"

Dean was shocked; he stepped forward and took me into his arms. "Oh my God, Rory, I'm so sorry. I had no idea. I'm so sorry, please forgive me. I'm here now, please, I'm so sorry." Dean was talking quietly, obviously having calmed down. I stood hugging Dean, wanting to just be held, by who, it didn't matter. Little did I know Jess was once again mad, and stormed off into the diner, mad that I had ignored him when my boyfriend just punched him in the face.

"Dean? Can you walk me home…I just wanna go home…" I asked quietly.

"Sure, of course. Lets go." Dean grabbed my hand as we slowly made our way into the direction of my house. When we got there I walked up the front steps and took my key out of my pocket.

"Come on, let's get you to bed." Dean said as he tried to usher me into the house.

"No, it's fine. I just want to be alone right now, Dean. I need some time to think. I have a lot I have to figure out, and I just need to do it alone. Just…go. Please, you should go home. I'll be fine." I stated. I didn't want to deal with Dean right now. I wanted Jess. I knew I shouldn't, but I did. He would just sit with me, and be quiet, he always knows what to do. But I knew that if I let Dean into the house he would try and make me talk, and probably be clingy, thinking that's what I wanted, but I don't.

"Rory, I don't want to leave, you shouldn't be alone right now. You need to talk about this." Dean said. I knew it. He wants me to talk. I just want to sleep and try to forget this horrible day.

"Dean, please, just leave. I'll be fine, I promise," I persisted, "Seriously. If the slightest thing happens I'll call, okay?"

"Fine, I'll go," Dean said finally giving up. He leaned in and tried to kiss me, but I turned my head and he ended up kissing my cheek. He noticed but just wrote it off due to that fact that my mother just died. "Bye, call me tomorrow." Dean slowly retreated back down the street.

I walked into the house slowly. I made my way into the living room, walked through the kitchen and back to the living room. She was everywhere. Every place I looked I could only see my mom. I made my way up the stairs slowly, and opened my mother's bedroom door. I made my way inside and sat down on the bed. I looked around slowly, realizing that I would never see her frantically throwing clothes around the room looking for the perfect thing to wear. No longer would she fall out of her bed because of her alarm clock. And as I realized all this, tears started slowly rolling down my face. She was gone, for good. I would never see my best friend ever again, and it was killing me. I reached over and grabbed the phone on the nightstand. I dialed an all too familiar number and heard his gruff greeting.

"Hello?" He said groggily.

"Jess," I said quietly trying not to break down over the phone as the tears continued to slide across my face, "please…I need you."

"I'm on my way." He said worriedly, knowing something was wrong.


	6. All I Want

I sat alone on my couch, the tears long gone. I couldn't stop thinking that she really wasn't coming back, she's gone, and I'm never going to be able to see her again.

A knock at the door broke me out of my thoughts. I all but ran to the door knowing it was Jess. I swung the door open and he immediately took me into his arms, and the floodgates opened again. I really didn't think that I could cry anymore, but here I was. Crying hysterically in Jess' arms, and he wasn't making any move to get away from me. I knew he thinks he's not really good at the whole comforting people thing, but honestly, he's the only person making me feel half way sane right now. I almost want to feel guilty about that. That I'm with a guy who is not my boyfriend, and he's the only person I want to be with. I suddenly think I want to stay in his arms forever, my eyes snap open at that thought. _Where did that come from?_

I realize now that somehow he has moved me to where we are on the couch, and I have stopped crying, but he's still holding me. I slowly lift my head and look up at him. I suddenly want to cry again. He has a slight bruise on his cheekbone, where I'm guessing Dean hit him. My hand immediately goes up to it, and my fingers brush over his face softly, so as not to hurt him.

I see him looking at me, and I lock eyes with him. One tear silently rolls down my face, and I feel him reach up and brush it away.

"I'm so sorry." I state sadly.

"About what?" he asked completely confused. "You didn't do anything."

"Yes I did. I'm so sorry I let Dean hit you, and then just walked off. I was just, I don't know, I just wanted someone to hold me, and it happened to be him at the moment, and I was just so scared, and I wasn't thinking. I'm just so sorry, I should've made sure that you were okay. I feel horrible…" I trailed off.

"Rory, look it's okay. I'm not hurt. Fortunately for me, Dean hits like a girl." He smirks hoping he could lighten the situation. And it did, I found myself smiling slightly, knowing he was just trying to make me feel better. And that made me feel wonderful. That even though my boyfriend just put his fist in his eye, that he's still here, trying to help me.

"Thank you for coming. I just….I came in here, and everything just reminded me of her. And, I don't know… I just didn't want to be alone tonight. I'm sorry I woke you." I said quietly.

"Rory, stop apologizing. It's okay. Look…you know...it's...I'm here for you, okay? Day or night. I don't want you to go through this alone. And you won't. I'm here, Luke's here, the whole town's here."

I smile at him. "Thanks, Jess. It means a lot that you're here, especially after how I've been treating you lately." I say looking right into his eyes. _God, those eyes._

"What do you mean?" He asked obviously not thinking about everything that's been happening over the past few months.

"Jess….me completely ignoring you these past few months, and when I do talk to you I'm being cold, and…and what happened at the hospital…in the truck…" I see his face distort to utter shock, that I would even bring it up. "Also, what happened at Sookie's wedding. I just…I haven't been very fair to you lately, and it's just cause I'm scared…"

"Scared of what?" He says quietly, almost as if he's afraid of the answer.

"Scared of how I feel about you. I mean, we just click, you know? And I'm so scared, because I know that what I'm doing with you is wrong, and that it will hurt Dean, and the worst part is, is when I'm with you, I don't care. I don't care that I might hurt someone who cares about me. All I care about is you and how you make me feel…" I trail off, thinking I've said too much.

"Rory…." He stops, like he's at a loss for words. So I slowly lean forward and gently brush my lips against his, he responds eagerly, but I pull away and rest my forehead against his. I slowly, look up into his eyes, and we just stay there for a minute, looking at each other, before finally I break the silence.

"Look…can we figure this out later. I just….this isn't really the best time for us…for me, to be having this conversation. I mean, after everything that's happened, I just need to focus on my mom, and trying to figure out what I'm going to do. Is that okay? If we like, postpone this…us? Please." I silently beg, hoping he'll say yes. I want him to wait for me, and I no longer care how selfish that sounds.

He looks into my eyes, and slowly brings his hand to the side of my face, "Rory, I know. And, that's fine. I want you to take whatever time you need. I don't want to push you. But I have to ask one question, please, and then I won't talk about it anymore." He says. I nod, telling him to go on. "What about Dean? I mean, if there might be something between us, what about him?" He says quietly, scared that I might back out, now that Dean was brought into the conversation.

"I'll….I'll talk to him tomorrow, tell him, that I can't be with him anymore. That, he just isn't the one that I want." He looks up at me surprised that I just agreed to break up with Dean for him. He leans in and kisses me softly, but breaks it just as fast as it began.

"Jess? Can we go to bed? I'm so tired, I just want to sleep this day off."

"Sure. Come on." He pulls me to my feet, grabs my hand, and walks me into my room. He walks over to my bed, and pulls the covers down, motioning for me to get in. I walk over taking my shoes and jacket off on the way, and climb in. He pulls the covers over me, kisses me on the forehead and walks over to the chair I have in my room.

"Jess, you don't have to sleep in the chair." I said. I scooted over, and patted the bed beside me. "Please, I really would rather have you beside me." I basically plead. He smiles softly, gets up and climbs into the bed beside me. I roll over so that my back is to him, in order to make more room. I feel him scoot all the way over until our bodies are completely touching. He puts his arm over my waist, and kisses my neck.

And as we lay there, I started thinking about my mom. And how much I loved her. I knew she would want me to be happy, no matter what. And I knew that I would get through this. I had may not have her, but I have Jess. And right now, he's all I need.

I feel myself drifting off to sleep, knowing I will dream about her, but it won't be bad. Because she will always be with me, no matter what.


	7. Desperate

I woke up the next morning feeling run down. i tossed and turned most of the night. Whenever i closed my eyes all i could see was her. Her always smiling face, staring down at me.

I rolled over to see Jess, sound asleep, and quietly snoring. I smiled then. When most people snore, it's obnoxious, but his was almost... well, cute. Slowly I rolled out of bed, and went to the kitchen to fix myself a glass of water. My throat was raw, and i had a headache. I put the glass in the sink, and shuffled into the bathroom. As i gazed at myself in the mirror, I realized that i looked just as horrible as i felt. My eyes were red and puffy, and there was mascara smeared across my cheeks, from all the crying. My hair was a mess, and my clothes were wrinkled beyond repair. I turned the shower on, and walked to the closet to grab a towel. I went to the bathroom and locked the door, slowly stripping of my clothes, and stepping soundlessly into the shower. The scolding water felt good on my tense body. I'm not entirely sure how long i stood there for, but i slowly started to feel the water getting colder, and got out. i dried off, and wrapped the towel snuggly around my body. I slowly crept back into my room, so as not to wake Jess, and found that he was still sound asleep, with the sheets, tangled in a mess around his legs. I found a pair of my blue skinny jeans, with a black v-neck, and walked back out of the room, and into the bathroom to change. Once i was done, i combed my hair, and tossed it into a messy ponytail on top of my head. And then i just stood in the living room. I had no idea what to do with myself. I obviously was not going to school today, there was no way i could handle that. I found myself staring longingly at the staircase, waiting for her to come bursting down them at any second, and out the door, before she was late to work, yet again. But i realized, that would never happen again. No more dragging her out of her coma like sleep in the mornings, no more walks to Luke's to get coffee and breakfast, no more movie nights and take out. It never truely occured to me, that my mom was a very basic part of my life. We did everything together. And now that she was gone, I had no idea what to do with myself.

Slowly, I walked up the stairs and into her room. I knew now would be a normal time to start crying once again, but I just didnt have it in me. There were no more tears for me to cry. I sat down on her bed and stared at the wall. I still had yet to call my grandparents, or anyone, for all i knew everyone was still clueless as to what happened. Finally I couldnt put it off any longer. I reached over to her nightstand and grabbed the phone, and dialed the all too familiar number to my grandparents house. It rang four times, before my grandmother finally answered.

"...I swear Madiline, why do i pay you, when you can't even answer a phone. Oh. Ummm.. hello this is Emily Gilmore."

"Grandma?" I heard my voice crack as i said that one word. My voice sounded so incredibly foreign to me.

"Rory? Hello dear, how are you?"

"Grandma, I need to tell you something, is Grandpa still there?"

"Yes dear, he is. Would you like me to get him... Richard! Richard! Rory's on the phone... No, just get in here."

"No! Grandma, could you possibly just tell him to wait. I need to tell you in person, would it be alright if i came over?"

'Well of course, Rory! You know we always welcome a visit from you."

"Okay, grandma. I'll be there in a bit." I hung up the phone before I could hear her reply. I could feel myself starting to loose my control.

I walked downstairs, to find Jess still passed out. I had no idea how he could sleep so much. I wrote him a note saying I had to go to my grandparents, and that I would call him when I got back. I left it on the pillow, and slowly walked out of the house.

The drive to New Haven seemed to take longer than usual. I didnt like how quite it was. it gave me too much time to think. And right now, that was the last thing i wanted to do.

I slowly pulled up to the front of the mansion my grandparents called home. I put the car in park, and sat. i couldn't move. I had no idea what I was going to say. i know my mom never had the best relationship with my grandparents, but still, she was their daughter, and this was going to break their hearts.

I looked into the review mirror, and saw tears once again, trailing down my face. I hadn't even realized I was crying again.

I got out of the car, and walked up the door, and rang the bell.

I stood there for a second before the door flew open, with a very scared looking maid on the other side. She told my grandparents were in the study, and she took my coat.

_Now or never_. I thought to myself.

I moved sluggishly across the foyer, and into the study. The second my grandfather looked up, and saw the tears streaming down my face, he was instantly concerned.

"Rory? Rory, what's wrong? Are you alright?" My grandfather asked. They both stood up and walked over to me.

"I...I dont know how to tell you guys this... Last night..." I heard my voice crack as the tears rolled harder down my face. "Last night... mom was in an accident." I saw both of the eyes widen in shock, and they looked as though they were preparing themselves for what i would say next.

"Well," my grandmother said, "What hospital is she in? Did she break anything? Does she need surgery?" My grandmother asked. It was as if she was begging me to tell her that mom was okay, that she was hurt, but she would be fine.

"No, grandma. She doesnt need surgery. She....She didnt...She didnt make it." i felt my knees give out as I sank to the floor. I looked up at the torn faces of my grandparents.

"Oh God..." I heard my grandmother whisper. In all the time I'd known then, I'd never seen my grandparents cry. And yet here they stood, both of them, with silent tears pouring down their faces.

"Richard..? Richard, my baby..." My grandfather took her into his arms as he tried desperately to comfort her. Suddenly she torn away from his grasp, and ran over to me, and got down onto the floor, to take me into her arms. I'd never seen my grandma so... so human.

And we stayed like that for i dont know how long. My grandfather leaning on his desk with his head in his hands, and my grandmother and I, in a heap on the floor, trying desperately to come to terms with what has happened.

**A/N: Sorry if the grandparents seem a little out of character. But i feel in desperate times, no one is really as they usually are. let me know what you think. are sorry that there wasnt really any rory/jess action. but lets face it, her mom just died. i dont really think it would be appropriate to have lemony fluff at this point in the story. Reviews and constructive critisism are always welcome. Thanks for reading.**


	8. Contentment

I walked slowly out of my grandparents house. I'd told them I had to get back to Stars Hollow to make sure everyone knew. They told me that they would handle planning the funeral and service, and had given in, and listened to me, when I told them I wanted it to be in Stars Hollow. My grandparents really didn't like Stars Hollow, but they know how much it meant to me and my mom, so they agreed.

It felt nice not having to worry about taking care of the arrangements with the hospital, and the funeral home, and the preacher, and the church, setting up the service. It was a huge weight lifted off my shoulders.

However, I still wanted to go home, crawl into my bed, put the blanket over my head, and just sleep for the rest of my life. I hadn't realized I was back at my house until I pulled in the driveway. It was already getting dark. Apparently I was at my grandparents for a lot longer then I realized. I got out of the car, and trudged up the front steps to the door. The door creaked open at an alarmingly slow pace. The house seemed darker, eerier, emptier. I stood in the doorway just looking inside. I wasn't sure I could go back into the house alone yet. It just seemed like it was too soon. So I did the only thing I could think of. I ran. I didn't know where I was going until somehow I ended up in front of the diner.

I walked in and saw Jess leaning over the counter reading a book. Jess looked up when he heard the bell ring over the door, and he looked instantly relieved to see me. I saw Luke come out of the back. He didn't look like himself. His clothes were rumpled, he had dark circles under his eyes, like he hasn't been sleeping. He looked like a ghost of himself. I suddenly felt my heart break even further. I'd always known that Luke was in love with my mom. He was always on the sidelines, waiting for her to finally realize he was there. Always the one to swoop in and save her when another man broke her heart. And now he was never going to get that shot. He was never going to be able to wake my mom up to what was right in front of her. He must be miserable. And then, I finally felt like maybe someone else knew exactly what I was feeling. Luke loved my mom just as much as I did. For all intensive purposes, he was my father. He's always taken care of me. Brought me food when I was sick. Been there to congratulate me when I'd gotten a good grade. I loved Luke like he was my own dad. And I realized that he loved my mom and I as if he was, too. Before I knew what I was doing, my feet were moving at a shockingly quick pace, as I strode forward and threw my arms around Luke. I heard him gasp, obviously shocked, not even knowing I was in the diner. Before he wrapped his arms around me in a suffocating hug. I could feel tears streaming down my face, and his as well. He let go of me, and held me at arms length with his hands on my shoulder.

"Rory… how are you doing?" He asked.

"Okay, I guess. I just got back from my grandparents. They told me I don't have to worry about making the arrangements for the funeral or anything, that they would take care of it."

"Well… that's good… I'm going to go upstairs. You know… stuff to take care of." He stuttered. He was obviously feeling bit awkward, for crying not only in front of me, but in front of the customers in the diner, who were no doubt, probably starring at us. So I let him have his escape.

"Yeah, of course. Go ahead." And with that he tried to give me a reassuring smile, that didn't quite reach his eyes, before turning and heading up the stairs.

I stood there, trying to regaining some sort of composure, when I felt Jess come up behind me. He slowly turned me around and took me into his arms. I opened my eyes and looked over his shoulder, and into the shocked eyes of several towns people. Jess felt me suddenly tense, and probably realized the same thing I did. We were in front of the prying eyes of the town. As if he was reading my mind, he leaned down and whispered into my ear, "Hey, you want to get out of here?"

I just nodded my head, and he slowly let go of me, but grabbed my hand, as we walked out of the diner. We walked along silently, not really needing to talk. I'm not sure how long we were wandering around the town, but eventually we ended up at the bridge.

We sat down, still holding hands, and slipped into a comfortable silence. It was strange how comfortable I was with him. I could talk to him about anything. But then, there could be times where we could just sit together, and no words had to be spoken. We just enjoyed each others' presence.

"So…" Jess slowly started. I turned my body so I was facing him. "I was worried when I woke up alone this morning…" He trailed off. I swear I saw a light blush creep onto his face. Go figure right? Out of the two of us, HE'S the one worrying about waking up alone with ME gone.

"Yeah… I'm really sorry about that. But you just looked so peaceful sleeping, I didn't want to wake you. And I had to go see my grandparents."

"Yeah, I got you're note. Doesn't mean that I don't worry about you. I just… I don't know how to say this, without breaking our strict "put us on hold" agreement, but I get anxious when you're not with me. I feel like you're going to disappear." He finished with a slightly embarrassed tone. I just sat, staring at him in awe. For one thing, I'm pretty sure that was the most I'd ever heard Jess say at one time. Second, I cant believe he feels that way about me. Apparently I took too long to answer cause I saw his face fall as he stumbled over his words. "Uh… look… I know that you might not feel the same… and I'm not even sure why I just said that. I'm sorry"

"No Jess, it's okay. I'm sorry… I just… I don't know what to say. I get anxious when I'm not with you, too. Jess, I care about you. Even though I know I shouldn't. I just… I don't know how to explain it either. Just being with you calms me down. I don't know what I would've done without you these past couple of days. You didn't have to be there for me, and you have been. Unfailingly. I don't know how I can possibly thank you for helping me get through this." I'm not sure which one of us leaned in first, but the next thing I know, Jess and I were kissing. And this wasn't like the kiss in the truck. It wasn't rushed, or full of pent up anger. It was sweet and slow. It's like he's scared he might break me. I've never felt something so incredibly full of tenderness. We broke apart and he rested his forehead on mine and just looked into my eyes.

"You've done enough. Just by being here, with me." He whispered. He had a content smile playing on his lips. And as I leaned in again, just needed to feel his lips on mine again, I heard someone shout my name.

"RORY!" Jess and I broke apart, and both looked up to see who it was. And it just so happened to be a very pissed off looking Dean, storming towards us.


	9. The Girl

"_RORY!" Jess and I broke apart, and both looked up to see who it was. And it just so happened to be a very pissed off looking Dean, storming towards us._

I stiffened. This wasn't how this was supposed to happen. I was going to talk to Dean about everything, but not like this. The look on his face was one of pure rage. I was actually a little scared of what he might do. I've never seen someone look so livid in all my life.

"Rory! What the hell is going on?! I've been trying to reach you all damn day, and I find you here, with _him, _of all people!" Dean's face was turning the shade of a tomato, and Jess instinctively pulled me behind him, to protect me from whatever Dean might do. However, that only made things worse. "Get your hands off of her Jess! She's not your girlfriend, she's _mine!" _The way he said "mine" made me feel like a piece of property being squabbled over.

"Jess," I started slowly. He turned his head toward me, but still keeping Dean in his line of sight, just in case. "Why don't you go back to the diner? I need to talk to Dean alone." The look on his face was clear. He was worried. He didn't want to leave me alone with Dean. Not because he feared I might not go through with ending things between us, but because he was scared Dean might try something. He looked at me, pleading not to make him leave, but I knew I wouldn't be able to do this with Jess here. "Jess, please? I'll see you later, okay?"

He looked at me one last time, before nodding his head, "Okay. I'll see you later." And with that, he turned around, threw Dean a final glare, and walked off.

"Rory, what the hell was that? You told me you needed space, that you wanted to be alone. Well being with Jess, is _not _being alone. You know I don't like him." He was glaring down at me, waiting for an explanation. And as much as I wanted to lie to him, and not hurt him. I couldn't do it. It wasn't fair to anyone involved. Not to Dean or Jess. And it wasn't fair to me. I deserved to be happy. And I have to do what's going to make me happy. With that thought, I took a deep breath, and took two steps back, so I could see Dean better, but also because I was still a little afraid.

'Dean… I don't know what to say. I just need to be honest with you." The look on his face, seemed to hint like he knew what was coming, but he stayed silent. "I…I don't think I can be with you anymore…I've felt this way for awhile now. I just…I'm struggling so much to make you happy, and do what you want, that I've lost sight of what makes me happy, and what I want."

"Rory, don't lie to me. This is because of Jess, and we both know that. He's lying to you, Rory! Why cant you see that?! He just wants you because I have you!"

"Dean you don't _have _me! I don't belong to you! And you've tried to control my friendship with Jess from the beginning. And yes, Jess has _something _to do with this! But not why you think. Yes, I care about him, and yes, I want more from him then friendship. But this is because of you! We have nothing in common, Dean. We're totally different, and I don't want to hurt you, I really don't, but I cant keep worrying about you. You've let your apparent competition with Jess get in the way of our relationship, even before he and I became friends. You've been after him since he moved here. And I cant do this anymore." I sucked in a deep breath, and looked back up at Dean to see his reaction.

"Rory, are you going to be with him?"

"I don't know. I want to be, but I'm honestly not sure if I can deal with another commitment right now. I need to focus on my mom and what I'm going to do now, more then anything. But eventually, yes I will probably be with him. Dean… I really am sorry, and I know that probably means nothing right now, but I really didn't want to hurt you."

I looked back up at Dean, and he looked determined. I wasn't sure what was about to happen, but I figured he would be upset, not this.

"I'm sorry about your mom, and I know you're going through a lot right now. And that's why I'm not going to take this to heart. I think you're confused, and Jess is taking advantage of your vulnerability. So I'm going to give you your space to figure things out. But I'm not giving up. I'm still going to be there, until you realize that I'm the one for you." He finished with a deep breath. I was in complete shock. I wasn't expecting that at all. All I could think, was that he has completely lost his mind. And I know that sounds harsh, but there was nothing else I could think. What do you say to that? I saw him lean forward, and I tried to lean away, but unfortunately he's much larger then me, and he leaned forward more and kissed me on the cheek, turned and walked back up the bridge, toward his house. I'm not entirely sure how long I stood there, in complete and utter shock, but I finally remembered Jess, and took off walking towards the diner.

I walked through the diner door, and saw Luke behind the counter, he looked up and saw me, and then pointed toward to curtain, silently telling me that Jess was upstairs. I gave him a grateful smile, and took off toward the apartment. When I got to the top of the stairs, I could hear the muffled sound of City and Colour pouring out of his speakers. I was kind of surprised that Jess would be listening to Dallas Green strumming his guitar while he belted out "The Girl". I smiled to myself, somehow hoping he was listening to that song because of me. I didn't bother knocking, I silently opened to door and let myself in. I looked to the left to see Jess lying on his back, eyes shut, just listening to the music. He made no move to hint that he heard me enter the apartment. So I quietly shut the door and tip-toed over to the bed. I silently moved on top of him, so I was straddling his hips. His eyes shot open in surprise and looked up at me. His mouth forming a little "o" mirroring the shock his was obviously feeling. I smiled down at him. He regained his composure and gave me his signature crooked smirk. Then he got a sort of evil glint in his eye, and before I could protest whatever it was he was thinking, he flipped me over, so he was now straddling me, and dug his fingers into my sides, and began tickling me. I thrashed around shouting at him to stop in between gasps for air. My laughter filled the room, and I squirmed and wiggled trying to get away from his prying fingers. Finally he stopped, and looked down at me, his face suddenly serious.

"So… what happened with Dean?" He asked, quietly, almost as though he was afraid of the answer.

"Well…I broke up with him…" His eyes lit up, and as much as I didn't want to mention what else had happened, I didn't want to keep things from Jess. "And before you get too excited, he didn't seem to take it all that well."

Jess' eyes got darker then. "What did his do? Did he hurt you?!" He began frantically searching my arms and face for any sign of damage.

"Jess! He didn't hurt me. He didn't touch me. He just… well, I'm not quite sure how to say this cause I'm still a little shocked myself, but he said that he's not giving up. He said that you're taking advantage of my vulnerable state right now, and the only reason you want me, is because he had me. He said that he's going to give me space cause I'm confused and I don't know what I want, but that he wont wait forever, and he's going to be there until I realize he's the one for me…" I trailed off not sure I wanted to mention that Dean tried to kiss me, but I took a deep breath, and finished, "and then he leaned in and tried to kiss me, but I turned my head and he got my cheek, and then he just walked off." I looked back up to Jess, hoping he wasn't mad at me for letting Dean kiss me. I could rage in Jess' eyes. He looked thoroughly pissed off. He sat up, and got off me, and moved so he was sitting on the foot of the bed. He leaned forward and put his head in his hands. I wasn't too sure what I should do, so I moved so that I was sitting next to him, and stayed quiet, to give him time to gather his thoughts. He let out a frustrated sign, before looking back up at me.

'Rory, you don't believe that, do you?" I gave him a confused look, which he caught, and answered, "About me trying to take advantage of you. You don't think I would do that to you, right?" My eyes widened in surprise. How in the hell could he think that.

"Jess, of course not. I know you wouldn't do that to me. And you know, Dean's wrong. I'm not confused. I mean, maybe about my mom, and what this means for me. But the one thing I am sure about right now, is you. I trust you. I know you wouldn't do anything to hurt me. And I don't want you to think that I'm only with you because I'm looking for comfort right now. I don't want you to think that when I move past this, I'm going to leave you and go back to Dean. Cause that will never happen. I swear. I really care about you. You and Luke are the most important people in my life now…" I reached over and grabbed his hand in mine, hoping he knew that I was being completely honest with him right now.

Jess looked relieved. "I care about you too, Rory. And at the risk of sounding like a controlling jerk, I really want you to stay away from Dean. I just… he's obviously not going to give up, and I don't want to risk him doing anything to you, out of desperation to get you back. Just please, promise me you'll stay away from him?" Just looked at me, with wide eyes, begging me to just agree.

"Okay. I wont go near him. I trust your judgment, and if you think it's best for me to keep my distance, then I will." I felt him relax, and start to stroke my hand with his fingers. He looked up at me again, except this time, he looked at me with loving eyes, and he slowly leaned in, giving me time to say no, and gave me a gentle kiss. He pulled away just as quickly, and looked into my eyes.

"Hey Jess? I'm really tired, and I'm not sure I can go back to my house right now. Could I just stay here with you, maybe?"

"Of course. Come on." He got up, pulling me up with him, and walked to the side of the bed, pulling back the comforter and sheets, motioning for me to climb in. I did, and he climbed in next to me, pulling the blankets up over our bodies. I scooted over in the bed, until my entire body was touching his, and laid my head on his shoulder. He put his arm around my waist, and pulled me closer. We just lay there, silently drifting to sleep. But then I remembered something, and I moved my head so that my mouth was next to his ear.

"Hey Jess?" I whispered.

"Hmmm?" he responded groggily.

"Am I 'The Girl'?" I asked quietly.

I heard him let out a light chuckle. And say, "Yeah Rory. You're The Girl. You've always been The Girl." He leaned down and kissed my forehead. And that's the last thing I remember, before falling asleep, with a smile on my face.

**A/N: So sorry I take forever to update. I feel like a slacker. Feel free to punch me in the face if you ever meet me. Oh and the song "The Girl" by City and Colour is freaking amazing. Go listen to it. I love Dallas Green's voice. It makes me cry. So that's it for now. I have a pretty solid idea about where I want this story to go, and I promise I'll try my best to update in a more timely manner. Thanks to all who review. You guys seriously make my day.**


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